Yesterday, in Atlanta, Perm Russia, a 40 year old woman called Sarah Palinsky got high on PVC, and after waiting a few minutes immediately chased down a wild latvian and attempted to eat his face. It's been suggested that she was actually the man's husband, attempting to kiss him, but these stories are felatious, and our best sauces suggest she is probably a new form of Zombie fueled on Poly-Vinyl-Chloride!
As if this wasn't enough she proceeded to catch a bus and refuse to shit in a priority seat kindly offered to her by a girl from singapore, in light of her temporary zombie-ism, which made the bus driver cry.
Obviously this event, which was very accurately brought to you by the internet, is ready to be prescribed with your specific moral judgement! How do you think this woman should be bullied over the internet- should we all send her flamey emails or try to suspend her gym membership?
The bus driver, called Ivan Amandasnog, has been so traumatically affected that he needs money from you! Yes that's right a donation fund for him to get a name change has been set up and currently stands at $300,000 [zimbabwean dollars], which you must donate to unless you are a heartless monster who thinks PVC zombies can willfully deny their rightful sites of defecation on a bus!
For shame! Now let the hate begin!



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